A Pastor in the United Church of Canada Responds to Clerical Abuse
Essays on Clergy Abuse in
The United Church of Canada
The following are a collection of essays first posted by Rev. Morrison on United Online. They represent his reflections on the current issues facing ministry personnel in The United Church of Canada. He also offer some discussion starters on how we can respond as a denomination to clergy stress and isolation.
Clergy Union: Solution or Double Bind
The consensus seems to be that a clergy union will not work, but at least it forces the issue to be addressed. My observation is that when people get frustrated in a relationship, they cook up a plan aimed not at finding a solution, but at creating an effectively paralyzing double bind in the system. The double bind is meant to force the system to stop ignoring the problem.
You can tell a lot about where the primary obstacles are in a system by how the constructed double bind is directed. I would argue that in the case of the current union drive in the United Church, the double bind is directed at clergy in their episcopal, collegial, presbytery role. The union drive begs the wonderful, paradoxical, double-bind question: how do we clergy protect ourselves from ourselves?
And like any good double bind, in theory the only ones not paralyzed (any more than they already are) are the folk who first cooked up the double bind. But eventually the double bind can back fire on the creator because it is, at root, not intended as a solution. Nor is it functionally a solution.
Rather, it prompts someone to come along with a real solution, which threatens to leave the double-binders behind as the system moves forward to real second-order change. Anyone choosing to hold onto their bitterness rather than move ahead with a workable solution exposes themselves for who they really are: part of the problem to begin with.
What We Call Clergy Abuse
I believe the issue of clergy abuse is three pronged: 1) difficult parishioners, 2) unsupportive colleagues, and 3) personal maturity.
Difficult Parishioners - Congregational Governance
In my opinion, much of the difficulty with parishioners is related to congregational governance. Governance is, simply put, about funding and permissions. Ministry initiatives need money or other congregational resources. Ministry initiatives need stakeholder permission.
A typical scenario is the congregation that calls a minister to help achieve growth. The minister envisions a ministry initiative, attempts to implement it, and runs into resistance. Someone in the congregation uses their veto power to halt the ministry initiative, despite the minister's preparatory work.
In United Churches, this is typically played out in the Session vs. Stewards dynamic. Although the Session is responsible for giving permission for "people" ministries, the Stewards can veto access to funding or building use. The dynamic plays out wherever the governance structure has afforded "veto power" to a select group or individual over an area of funding or building space. The power to withhold permission for a ministry initiative can frustrate clergy.
The frustration for the minister comes from a disconnect between calling and cooperation in ministry. The governance structure says publicly that it wants the minister to lead, but the governance structure has not addressed veto powerbrokers in the governance structure.
Unsupportive Colleagues - Presbytery Governance
Almost all stories about clergy abuse in the United Church include disappointment with colleagues. Our ministry studies warn us about problem parishioners, dysfunctional congregations, and burnout due to overwork. But we are not adequately prepared for collegial abuse or abandonment.
If matters get out of hand in the congregation, someone often appeals to a higher court, namely presbytery. The minister looks to presbytery with a set of expectations. Mostly, the minister expects that he or she will be backed up on governance. When problems arise within the pastoral relationship, we have an institutionalized expectation that fellow ministers at presbytery will engage an objective and corrective process to protect us and to expose the troublemakers.
The minister has tried to play by the common, public set of governance rules in the congregation, but "problem parishioners" won't play by the rules. Surely someone in presbytery will see this and call the problem parishioners to account. But the anecdotes about clergy abuse are clear that this expectation of collegial support and protection is too often disappointed.
Why? In recent decades the presbytery landscape has become more problematic. Too often presbyteries divide themselves along conservative-liberal lines. When someone of a different theological stripe runs into trouble, we may blame his or her toxic theology and praxis for the mess. When someone of the same theological stripe runs into trouble, we may take it as more evidence that parishioners are toxic and unfaithful to our cause.
Moreover, protecting and supporting a colleague through pastoral problems takes a lot of time and energy. And clergy are already spread too thinly in presbyteries with JNACs, JSCs, PCO visits, inquirer committees, supervising students and pastoral charges, etc. Too often, and quite unfortunately, the path that leads most quickly to some semblance of pseudo-resolution (clergy exiting the pastoral charge) puts the matter to rest for colleagues at presbytery.
The problems with presbytery and collegiality are themselves set against a backdrop of congregational stress. Burnout happens not only when we are overworked, but also when we feel our work is meaningless. Despite the stats from Bibby showing some membership growth, too many clergy know that, despite their best efforts, their congregations are slowly declining, eventually doomed to close. When you go to work knowing that no amount of excellence will turn things around, that older parishioners will die soon without being replaced by new, young families-work can seem hopeless.
It is hard to find collegial support from a group already treading water.
Demographics also come into play at presbytery. I don't have numbers to support this, but my sense is that clergy are aging. Once upon a time, we had clergy of all ages, from young twenties through to retirees, in a presbytery. Over the past 10 or 15 years, new clergy were increasingly second-career baby-boomers adding to the ranks of existing baby-boomers and their elders. Fewer new clergy are young 20- or 30-somethings.
As we age, I think we naturally become worried, and even hopeless, about the state of any organization to which we belong. Older clergy have taken their lumps over the years, and they wonder if the organization will survive into the next generations. Older clergy know from experience that doing pastoral relations work can be deadly. Having young clergy around can bring new hope, vitality, succession planning, and that wonderful thing called idealism. But how many presbytery members, clergy or lay, are under 40? Under 30?1
For whatever reason, clergy are at risk when collegial support is absent or slow in coming, or fellow presbyters take sides depending on theological differences, or presbytery, not knowing its own rules, intervenes improperly. Most common, however, is the tendency for interveners to play mediator: to try to resolve the issue by equalizing blame. The favourite method is to determine that the minister has failed to manage his or her own personality, failed to keep the peace, deserving equal blame for the congregational distress.
The congregation accepts blame for not following proper process, but no structural changes are made to address congregational governance. At most, the problem parishioners are cast as poor governors. But the minister has been cast as a poor person-ality. In the eyes of presbytery, the parishioners are guilty, but the minister is shamed.
Personal Maturity - Self-Governance
The minister's personal process is a significant factor in congregational drama. Congregations are like families, and the minister's identity and self-esteem are intimately tied to perceived success or failure in ministry. Ministers can take things too personally. Ministers can fan the flames.
The biggest dynamic, however, comes from the governance-related nature of the conflict. When a minister's bids to influence the governance structure repeatedly fail, it is easy to turn to passive-aggressive or hyper-aggressive methods of influencing. Without an adequate support system to allow the minister emotional ventilation and feedback, the minister wrongly assumes that the great silent majority in the congregation and presybery will act as the ideal audience, seeing things exactly as the minister imagines. And responding and rescuing exactly as the minister imagines.
There is no substitute for dealing with one's own baggage and buttons. Without adequate attention to our own "stuff," ministers are prone to being anxiously reactive to the roadblocks and failed bids to influence congregational ministry.
Some hear in this analysis a "blaming of the victim." For me, any model or theory of clergy abuse that does not account for clergy agency is itself an abuse of me as a minister. I am an agent. To draw a parallel: I understand from clients who are rape victims or adult victims of childhood sexual/physical abuse that blaming the victim is unacceptable. But these same clients will not tolerate a treatment paradigm that cannot account for their agency and power.
Nonetheless, I always think it is appropriate to raise the warning about blaming the victim, lest the abusers run with that interpretation and ignore issues of difficult parishioners and unsupportive colleagues.
Where To From Here?
My first answer to the question is, "I don't know." I think that is the faithful answer. I do not know; and I hope we can invite the Holy Spirit to move among us. I hope we can trust the Holy Spirit's leading. I hope we can discern what is good and proper spiritual direction on this question.
Having said that, I will put forward some thoughts that I believe have some value in operationalizing the Spirit's leading. I don't believe for a moment that these are necessarily comprehensive or even good and faithful. But I put them forward according to my understanding of spiritual discernment: trust the Body to chew on it and affirm or not affirm God's calling in them.
Pastoral Triage
When I come into the office each Tuesday morning, a number of pastoral needs await me, usually piled up from the weekend and Monday. I do pastoral triage. What is truly a crisis, needing immediate response? What is important, but can wait? And what is dead or irrelevant to pastoral response?
Is the news about a union drive with clergy truly a crisis? Is it important, but nothing new, and not needing an immediate response? Or is it already too late, either because the moment has passed for our denomination to act, or because once the union genie is out of the bottle there is no turning back.
I'm leaning somewhere toward the middle ground between "crisis" and "can wait," with the momentum on the crisis side. Not because the media has jumped on the issue, but because I think the call for a union drive has started the clock ticking. And, most importantly, people are hurting, with everyone knowing a casualty story.2
Pastoral Principles
Given the three-pronged model I have presented above (Congregational Governance - Presbytery Governance - Self-Governance), I approach the issue, first and foremost, as an educational issue. Educate, educate, educate. Educate congregations. Educate presbyteries. Educate clergy. The principles that will determine the didactic content include the following.
Forgiveness. Here is how I conceptualize and operationalize this broad but powerful principle. I find in marital therapy that couples place too much emphasis on avoiding conflict. Conflict is inevitable. The more important relational skill is Repair. We lack repair mechanisms.
The analogy I use is spilled milk. You can educate your child all you want about how not to spill milk--to the point of making the child hypersensitive about spilling milk, which usually leads to a child frequently spilling milk. The more important skill is teaching the child how to clean up the milk after it has been spilled. The child is free for more spontaneity, the parent is free from hypervigilance, and the child learns a valuable skill: how to repair a mistake.
Educating for repair mechanisms in pastoral relationships is not spilled milk; it is more difficult, but it need not be more complex. Repair mechanisms in relationships involve moving past shaming to appropriate confessions of guilt, sometimes punishment, listening toward restitution, rehabilitation and openness to reconciliation. The same applies to pastoral relationships.
Graciousness. We are not in the habit of being gracious with one another. Anyone doing a content analysis of United Online posts over the past years could readily identify this truth. And that's just clergy talking to clergy. We can all name the parishioners who cause our heart rate to accelerate the moment we see them coming--we know they will have nothing gracious to say to us, and their cruel and demoralizing habits are slow but constant abuse.
Education for graciousness in pastoral relationships, both congregational and collegial, involves making people aware of what content and style of communication is toxic.
Discipleship. No one wants to follow anymore in this culture. The pastor's leadership in a congregation is accidental to the governance structure and mission. We get to preach, but when is the last time you heard a Session or Council meeting ask the pastor, "Where do you want to lead us on this issue…What direction do you discern to be God's leading?"
The irony is that the Presbytery-as-congregation is least likely to operationalize pastoral leadership. As past chairperson of Lambton Presbytery, I am in the middle of a restructuring proposal. But in addition to structural change, I wonder if we need a pastor. Now when I say pastor and presbytery in the same sentence, most automatically think I mean something like a pastoral care or counselling role, or a bishop. I do not. I think presbyteries should have a preacher. We know our congregations need and value having a regular preacher; but why not the presbytery--if it is actually a congregation of clergy? Sure, having a different preacher each meeting is nice variety, but would we recommend this to our pastoral charges?
My idea is crazy, and perhaps over the top. But I say: let's give every member of presbytery a ballot, have them write down the name of the one fellow presbyter they would most like to have preach at them for every presbytery meeting for the next 2-3 years. The name that gets the most votes is set apart for that role in presbytery. No nominations, no campaigning, hopefully as little popularity contest as possible. Whoever that person is, they are freed up from whatever presbytery (and even Conference) responsibilities they have, and they do nothing but preach. Not theological reflection at close of meeting. Preach and preside. I don't care if they don't want to. They do it anyway. If they believe in the concept of the congregation setting someone apart for the ministry of the Word, and respect the congregation's discernment, they will do it. And if they resist, trust that God will provide the belly of a fish.
Make presbytery a congregation for clergy, employing the very same strategies of Word and Sacrament we advocate in our parishioners' congregations.
Pastoral Oversight. Here is another dimension of discipleship and discipline sorely lacking within presbytery. The pastoral oversight visit is too often an exercise in futility. The national church needs to immediately draft standardized, relevant assessment tools for the presbytery's pastoral oversight visit to congregations. How do you really assess if the Ministry & Personnel Committee is functioning properly? How do you really assess if the clergyperson is making proper use of the gift of continuing education rather than fraudulently adding three weeks vacation? Because I believe corporate worship is central to congregational life and mission, how do you really assess the health of a congregation's worship? How many pastoral oversight representatives actually attend the worship service of the congregation they are overseeing? How do you really assess if a Session or Council is regularly asking the pastor, "Where do you want to lead us on this issue…What direction do you !
discern to be God's leading?"
Pastoral Relations. Here is another dimension of discipleship and discipline sorely lacking within presbytery. Even angels fear to tread here. Let's resource the brave souls who sacrifice themselves to this necessary presbytery task. The national church needs to immediately direct substantial amounts of financial resources to the training, support and succession planning of pastoral relations convenors and committees. How much money? Let me be so bold as to compare the amount to what the annual cost of a union would be.
The Rev. M.J. Perry makes a compelling argument that union reps are an affordable alternative to hiring a lawyer when trouble hits in the pastoral relationship. Our presbytery system, in this risk-management era, has evolved into a sterile monster that provides no advocate for the beleaguered pastor.
Hope. Growth in the Body of Christ has atrophied in our back yards. The front line of evangelism is not longer overseas. It is in Sarnia, Ontario. And Montreal. And Truro, N.S. And Swift Current, SK. And Banff, AB. And Smithers, B.C. We are not building for tomorrow. We are not operationalizing any hope for future worshipping congregations. This hopelessness infects the whole Body and its servants.
The congregation is the engine driving the future of The United Church of Canada. And the pastor is strapped to the front of the locomotive. The stewardship of the Mission and Service Fund will be forced, one way or the other, into a radical paradigm shift. Better sooner than later.
End Notes
1. The flip side, however, is that this concentration of older, baby-boomer clergy have the demographic clout needed to raise up issues of concern. And right now older, middle aged clergy are able to assert their need for something real and concrete to change.
2. There is debate about levels of stress and stress leave in the denomination. Cited in this debate is a misunderstood statistic about our Employee Assistance Program (EAP). The claim is that United Church ministers access the EAP plan more than other professions, evidence that our profession faces greater stress, perhaps from clergy abuse. It should be noted that our EAP is unique in that we can also access for supervision of our pastoral care and counselling. WarrenShepell, the denomination's EAP provider, fails to adequately differentiate this reason for accessing EAP, sometimes lumping requests for supervision under work stress, etc. Until WarrenShepell can adequately differentiate this variable, it is premature to assert that United Church ministers access EAP more often than other professionals. Maybe we do, maybe we don't...but I don't think we know yet.
Rev. Dr. Bradley T. Morrison
Grace United Church
Sarnia, ON
November 12, 2004
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